Encouragement 4 The Day: "There but for the Grace of God go I"

So I haven’t written in a while but there are times when you come across information so profound that you either must share it or risk suffering an aneurysm from the information overload. I tried hard to suppress the urge to write this (laziness) but I just couldn’t.

Such a moment occurred this evening as I was watching the show on Hulu “Secrets of Your Mind” and in this episode they examined the brains of killers in an effort to answer the question “Why?” Towards the end of the segment, they interviewed Dr. James Fallon who for years studied the brain of serial killers and due to the prompting of his mother, not only discovered a direct paternal lineage of serial killers, but also discovered that his brain and genetic wiring reflected that of a killer. The only explanation that he could offer as to why he had not killed or even physically harmed anyone was this-He grew up in a loving and supportive family!

I had to hit the pause button because I really needed to digest this information. Here was a neuroscientist whose brain (and they showed the scans) indicated that he really should have been a serial killer but to his friends and family he was a ‘gentle soul’.

Two profound lessons:

1.       When we are tempted to judge others or to state “I would never do that” OR “Well, I was abused too and I never turned out that way” remember “There but for the grace of God go I!”

See, we truly do not know what we are capable of until we find ourselves in certain situations. So, it behooves us not to judge as only God knows the hearts of men and when we do not understand-PRAY.

2.      “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” I Peter 4:8.

A lot of “Christians” are quick to criticize ministers who preach a love message often stating that in doing so, they are condoning sin. I will stand behind my belief that:

Love will convict the heart faster than any message of hellfire and damnation.

Too often, Christians try to do the convicting work of the Holy Spirit while neglecting their duties of extending love to their fellow man. If this story is not the ultimate example of that then I don’t know what is.

Is it easy? No it isn’t, but when tempted to judge I try to remember:

                                                                 “There but for the grace of God go I.”

Encouragement 4 The Day: "Christianity and the Heart of God"

So I’m reading another book by Philip Yancey “The Bible Jesus Read” and in there was a passage which read:

“God has it out with loud complainers like Job, Jeremiah and Jonah. He engages Abraham and Moses in lengthy arguments- and sometimes lets them win! In his wrestling match with Jacob, God waits until daybreak to inflict the wound; till then, Jacob holds his own. Quite obviously, God prefers honest disagreement to dishonest submission.”

Honest disagreement to dishonest submission…how absolutely profound and contradictory to what’s being taught in many churches today. Questioning God is still taboo. Being a witness in the midst of struggles is paramount to sainthood. Please don’t misunderstand me here. I agree that God is all powerful and for His brilliance alone, He deserves our respect. Maintaining a cheerful demeanor in the midst of trials is certainly a means of witnessing and of being an inspiration to others.

Here’s my divide: Where do you place Christians who desire to love God but in the midst of pain find it hard to do so? Should they keep up the cheerful façade or honestly take their issues up with God?

My conclusion:

·         I agree with Yancey-God knows the heart anyway so the smile on your face, the song on your lips and the anger in your heart does not fool Him.

·         As with a lover, a relationship only lasts when you can truly believe in the other person’s heart.

·         Ergo, if you find yourself struggling with God, you’re having an issue with His heart and quite frankly, it’s pointless and fake going through the motions just because it’s expected of you.

·         Wrestle with God-it fosters an engaging rather than a passive Christian experience. Wrestle with Him until you can grab hold of His heart.

·         It is only then when in the midst of the storm will you TRULY be able to say and feel the words: “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him…” Job 13:15

No one can do this for you just as no one can love someone else for you. Your church, your pastor, those praying sisters cannot latch on to the heart of God for you. And so, each person’s journey, each person’s relationship, each person’s faith will be different.

Find God for yourself…

Encouragement 4 The Day: "God's Heart"

This is an issue that I truly struggle with…I believe in God’s brilliance when I consider the world and all that He’s created but human suffering often makes me question His heart. Yes, I’ve heard the argument that God does not cause bad things to happen and that sin holds the primary responsibility for all the pain in the world however, the question then often pops into my head: “Who then in more responsible, the entity which causes the pain or the entity which has the power to prevent it?” OR is it that they share equal responsibilities?

I am afraid that yes indeed, I am a doubting Thomas as I cannot just believe or have faith without having some form of logical reconciliation to my questions. Like Thomas I need to feel the imprints of those wounds. As I struggle this is what I am realizing (i.e. my light bulb moment):

“I will never understand why suffering is allowed in many instances and not prevented by an all powerful God. I will not understand at this present moment because I cannot see the beginning from the end nor am I able to see into the hearts of man. Therefore, trying to understand a complex issue with limited vision is senseless. It’s like trying to solve a math equation with half of the problem.”

Then What? Now I understand the purpose of faith.

If I believe in God’s brilliance and I acknowledge that I cannot see what He sees then I choose to believe in His goodness whether the visible outcome is good or bad. That’s the clincher for me-that faith is not just some arbitrary form of reasoning. It’s a conscious decision to trust in an all powerful Being who obviously trumps my intellect.

I can hear the some of the mature Christians probably saying: “Duh.” Oh well (smile). We all have to EXPERIENCE God for ourselves…that’s how we build a firm foundation.  I am not one who believes in not questioning God but that’s a topic for another day.

Encouragement 4 The Day: "You will love again..."

I came across a posting “Cancer kiss-off: Getting dumped after diagnosis” an article which primarily discussed women who were deserted after being diagnosed with cancer.   One participant to the article mentioned coming home after her first radiation treatment only to discover an empty house-her husband had just UP and LEFT her! (I know of no better way to convey my sentiments)

I could only imagine the immeasurable pain and disappointment now coupled with the fear of a compounded unknown. Modern day Jobs…that’s what came to mind. This poem was written after a friend informed me of her divorce and I think/hope that it’s appropriate in this case also.

I used to think that the phrase “Time does heal” was so cliché but indeed it is true. Time may not cure but it does foster healing.

You Will Love Again

You promised forever and today

Your ‘forever’ is gone.

Allow your heart to heal from its pain.

And it will heal.

It’s larger and stronger than you believe.

Leave it open.

Employ love,

Not pain to speak your story.

You have loved before…

In time,

You will love,

And be loved again.

Encouragement 4 The Day: "Silent Scream"

When someone understands us, when they truly get US and they want to stick around anyway-what a precious gift of friendship that is. Do you have someone like that in your life? I’m not talking about family (they’re supposed to love your craziness… HA!). No, I’m talking about a total stranger, who one day walked into your life and decided that you were OK. If you are one of the lucky ones, please let them know how grateful you are that your paths have crossed.

I love to 'people watch'. I can sit for hours in a mall and just watch people walk by. Some of them smile at me but it doesn’t reach their eyes. It’s as if I can see all the loneliness, worry and stress mirrored in their gaze and what’s touching is that still; they make an effort to smile. This poem is for them…

Silent Scream

I heard you scream.

Didn’t think I heard you

Did you?

You were walking by and

Turned to me and smiled.

And although your lips were shut

I felt your pain.

It was in your eyes,

The scream was in your eyes.

I pray for you.

I prayed for you then.

Encouragement 4 The Day: “Pain, the Pulse and the Heart of God”

This is a concept that with me is presently evolving and so I’m rather hesitant to speak of it without arriving at a final conclusion. There are those thoughts however which create such a paradigm shift in ones mode of thinking, that to hold it in, creates a tremendous build up of pressure. So this post is my release of that pressure valve.

I’ve been reading Philip Yancey’s book “Where Is God When It Hurts?” and as a result was introduced to Dr. Paul Brand. Dr. Brand spent the majority of his life blazing a medical trail in the treatment of leprosy. One of the key points which he noted in his research was- that leprosy in and of itself, was not the primary cause of the disfigurements which he witnessed in so many of his patients. Instead, it was the absence of pain due to the destruction of nerve endings caused by the disease, which allowed them to injure their bodies without realizing that they were doing so. It was through this realization that Dr. Brand developed an appreciation for the phenomena of pain.

This is where the little gray cells in my brain started firing overtime. I began to consider pain (both physical and emotional) running rampant in this world.  I reflected on human suffering while noting songs such as “When Peace like a River”, or the many books available like the ones written by Joni Eareckson Tada and Philip Yancey. Each song, each book representing profound ministries born out of pain yet so positively affecting the lives of millions. Gradually I started to realize that maybe in my focusing on what was wrong with this world- I’d become blinded to the blessings of pain. Yes, indeed I said it: “the blessings of pain” and with that concept still being so new to me, I literally cringe every time I consider it.

However, when I reflect on the lives of fellow human beings who have experienced considerable tragedy while still retaining and increasing their love for and service to God, I indeed started to recognize a pattern. Something great happens and their ministries (intended or not) take on such a widened sphere of positive influence that one has to stop and take notice. An even greater phenomenon is that each contributor acknowledges their painful experience as being a positive and pivotal point in their lives.

It’s as if, when we in the midst of our pain turn to God instead of away from Him and look for reasons to praise Him in spite of the anguish, we gain access to His pulse and His heartbeat and miracles happen.  In other words, the very thing that Satan would have to destroy us, God uses it to draw us closer to Him if we would allow it. But it doesn’t stop there. He then seeks to reward us as He did with Job for, it is one thing to serve Him when it’s all going good, but when we determine to serve Him in the midst of our pain, we have placed our fingers on His pulse and He allows us to feel His heartbeat.  What greater joy can there be than to have such closeness to the heart of God?

Encouragement 4 The Day: “Blessing People With Your Words”

The title of this post comes from one of Joel Osteen’s sermons #502 “Blessing People with Your Words.” I am becoming more convinced every day, that as a general rule, we fail to comprehend the power of the words that we speak. So callously we sometimes toss around our thoughts without conscious consideration of the consequences behind our actions. One of the key points in Joel’s message pointed out the concept that- thinking something good about someone does them no good, unless they hear it from us and therefore, we should be free with our compliments. Sadly just the opposite is true. We tend to be free with our criticisms and judgments and tight lipped with our compliments.

Consider Job’s friends…not once did they encourage him or remind him of what a special person he was in the eyes of God. Is it any wonder God informed them that unless Job prayed for them they would be in some serious trouble? How about the words which we speak to ourselves? When you make a mistake do you call yourself stupid? Are you going through a difficult time and you keep telling yourself that it will never get better? Solomon, the wisest man who ever lived stated: “Death and life are in the power of the tongue…” Proverbs 18:21 KJV

I encourage you today to speak words of life, hope and encouragement to yourself and to others. Out of the million and one combinations that could have occurred during your conception God created YOU! Anyone familiar with science at all understands, that you being here just as you are did not happen by chance. You were created by God for a purpose and God does not make mistakes. Do not allow words of discouragement to keep you from your God given purpose in this life. Remember, no matter what you’re going through or how much of a mess you think you’ve made of your life: “…He who began a good work in you will carry it on to COMPLETION until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:6

Watch Joel’s sermon here:

 

Encouragement 4 The Day: "Where is God when I Hurt?"

As I surfed the internet today I came across a profound statement that literally slapped me across the face. It’s funny how words, phrases or sentences can take the same idea or principle and give it a whole new meaning. Indeed, the written word is a powerful tool and should therefore be used wisely and with great caution.

So what was it that I read? Here it is from the website http://www.becauseofgod.com/theme_devotions_for_women/where_is_God_when_I_hurt_part_2.html 

“When you think and feel things like, “I am hurting so much but I don’t feel God’s presence!  It is hard for me to think of Him much less pray to Him in my hurt!  I feel He has deserted me because He doesn’t seem to answer my cry for help!”  You need to understand (if you don’t already know) that from a psychological and physical standpoint, when you hurt your mind doesn’t think very clearly, because your mind is mentally trying to handle the pain. Your emotions are screaming pain and hurt so it isn’t easy to feel anything but what you are experiencing. When you are suffering, anxiety and depression can also weigh on your feelings and outlook on life. So when you feel like He isn’t there when you are suffering, you need to realize no matter how you feel He is with you!”

How absolutely profound! I knew that when someone was in a depressed state or going through extreme mental or emotional anguish situations ‘appear’ to be worse than they actually are. I’ve experienced that so frequently…something that may not bother me when I’m happy will cause me to bite someone’s head off when I’m sad or depressed. BUT, it never occurred to me to link that with my feelings of abandonment by God. It’s empowering when you can cognitively recognize that what you’re feeling is not factual but a symptom of your emotional state. Subsequently, I further understood why loving God and your fellow man should not be based upon feeling but based upon choice-in other words, loving with your head in addition to your heart.

So if you’re feeling as if God has abandoned you-He hasn’t. If you feel as if it won’t ever get better-IT WILL. Recognize that these feelings of despair are symptoms of your pain and just as your body can heal so can your mind and your soul. This too shall pass!

Rest if you must but DO NOT QUIT!

Poem by Claudia Minden Weisz-"And God Said No"

And God Said No

I asked God to take away my pride. And God said "No".
He said it was not for Him to take away, but for me to give up.

I asked God to make my handicapped child whole. And God said "No".
He said her spirit was whole, her body was only temporary.

I asked God to grant me patience. And God said "No".
He said patience is a by-product of tribulations. It isn't granted, it is earned.

I asked God to give me happiness. And God said "No".
He said He gives me blessings, happiness is up to me.

I asked God to spare me pain. And God said "No".
He said suffering draws me apart from worldly cares and brings me closer to Him.

I asked God to make my spirit grow. And God said "No".
He said I must grow on my own. But He will prune me to make me fruitful.

I asked for all things that I might enjoy life. And God said "No".
He said He will give me life, that I may enjoy all things.

I ask God to help me love others, as much as he loves me.
And God said "Ah, finally you have the idea!"

Copyright © Claudia Minden Weisz (the mother of a Rett Syndrome child)

Encouragement 4 The Day-"Fair-Weathered Friends"

“After Job prayed for his friends, the Lord gave him success again. The Lord gave Job twice as much as he owned before. Job’s brothers and sisters came to his house, along with everyone who had known him before, and they all ate with him there. They comforted him and made him feel better about the trouble the Lord had brought on him, and each one gave Job a piece of silver and a gold ring.” Job42:10-11 NCV

I think you know where I’m going with this post considering the title-right? Where were all these family members and friends when Job was in the midst of his crisis? Not a one is mentioned (except his suicide advocating wife and his [3+1] self righteous friends).

Are you going through a crisis and there is no-one to turn to? Have the friends who promised to ‘have your back’ all disappeared and maybe family members are offering nothing but criticism?

“…I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Joshua 1:5 NIV

“Do not put your trust in princes, in mortal men, who cannot save.” Psalm 146:3 NIV

Remember:

·         You are not the only one who has been deserted by those you love- they also deserted Christ.

AND

·         You are not alone- “As God was with Job, He is also with you.”

Encouragement 4 The Day-"When God has more Faith in Us than We have in Ourselves"

Persevering through trials is certainly not an easy task and in the midst of the pain hearing the phrase: “God never puts more on you than you can bear” may actually bring to mind a few choice words. “Hear me out” and consider Job.

Do you think that God’s plan was to set Job up for failure and allow Satan the pleasure of saying “I told you so”? Certainly not, God knew EXACTLY what Job was capable of yet Job in the midst of his pain certainly did not (he wanted to give up and die).  So what is the lesson?

1.       We cannot see what’s going on behind the scenes-stop trying to figure it out-trust God.

2.       We will have doubts-feel the fear and trust God anyway.

3.       If you’re going through it-He’s allowing it and there’s a good reason for it-trust God.

4.       When it seems to be more than you can bear-sometimes we fight when we should be resting-trust God.

5.       If He believes in you and your ability to be faithful (in spite of the pain)-He must know- He’s carried you this far-trust God.

I know in theory it all sounds good and I know that pain takes it to a whole other level, but if we can just remember the story of Job. Job had no clue that his end would be better than his beginning-he just refused to desert God and God did not let him down.

Encouragement 4 The Day-"Perspective"

 

An Indian proverb goes: “I had no shoes and complained, until I met a man who had no feet.”

Sometimes in the midst of our pain we need a little perspective. In the process of searching for a job and getting desperate, I was feeling rather sorry for myself especially since (as I explained to God), I was not asking for a hand-out…I wanted to work. To show you the level of my desperation I actually typed into Google the words “please God help me find a job” and arrived at this link: http://prayersonline.net/2008/08/07/lord-please-help-me-find-a-job/. At this prayers online website I read the heart wrenching prayers of those of loved God and longed for Him to intervene on their behalves.  One gentleman by the name of Patrick really touched me and this was his post:

Patrick

“Dear Jenni,
I just want to join you in prayer with you and others about your situation and encourage you in the Lord to be patient and God some how through His divine love will grant you Divine favor…..I am in a similar situation,in fact I just requested prayer for myself and family,my wife and myself are currently unemployed,I am the head of the household,I have been trying to find a job for the past 8 months..eviction is about to be served,our utilities about to be turned off,my step daughter is bipolar and very violent…last week I was on the road seeking jobs all over I could not drive our truck because I could not afford gas,after walking over 10 miles I was simply tired and worn out..I crossed the street to the other side,a cop came out of nowhere and gave me a ticket for “jaywalking” I apologised to her,explained that I honestly was not aware there was a cross walk,I thought she would have warned me she did not ,the fine was $116.25, I went to court and paid the ticket,the last money I had to help out with food,that same night they repossesed our truck,the utilities are being turned off,eviction notice about to be served…yes the storm is blowing but somehow I believe that Jesus is allowing this for a divine reason,I keep on believing that He will not leave nor forsake us regardless of the situation,I keep trying to encourage my wife so as not to have her nor myself become like Esau when he sold his birthright just for a morsel of bread..Jenni right now I am so physically hungry but I am here at the local library filling out applications on-line,Jesus Christ is my Bread of Life and I know somehow if I continue to obey Him ,continue doing the right things without compromising I know somehow he will pull us through..I pray God’s peace on your situation,I pray especially for your little baby,I pray God’s special anointing on his precious little life,I pray that God may encamp His angels around your Household and give you protection against all attacks,I pray that the Blood of Jesus Christ be sprinkled on the doorpost of your family’s minds,may He grant you provisions,His Peace,His mercy and His love.Amen.”

Here was someone in the midst of his own pain, while hungry, reaching out to bless someone else. May God forgive me for my grumbling and fill my heart with such a burdening love, that I will do more for my fellow man.

Encouragement 4 The Day-"When God answers a question with one of His Own."

Aside from turning Job’s focus away from himself, I never understood why God answered Job in the manner in which He did when He finally decided to acknowledge his cries. I felt as if He (God) was being rather hateful, arrogant and unsympathetic towards Job’s plight. Did Job not have the right to ask “Why?” Here was a man who had been careful not to sin, petitioned before God everyday for his children, befriended the poor and less fortunate and not only was his behind being kicked up one street and down the next, but his friends were harassing him with their accusations. Job held out for seven days and after the seventh day he wanted to die. Not only was he in emotional pain, but he was suffering physically and spiritually because he could not find God. If there ever was a hell on earth…this was it!

Still, when God finally answered Job He seemingly lashed out. Now don’t get me wrong. God being God had every right to retaliate but here again, I could not reconcile this reaction with the painted picture of a loving parent and a child. After all, how many of us sinful parents, if a child cried out in pain, would not acknowledge them and when we finally did, would not then lovingly answer as to why we’d taken so long to respond. Only the sadist personality would react unkindly…so why this seemingly unkind reaction from God?

The answer in my opinion lies in Job’s reaction to this onslaught of questions. He HUMBLES himself! Me? I probably would have flared up with self-righteousness indignation and begin rattling off the reasons why I DID NOT deserve this treatment. But Job, he humbled himself. I would love to hypothesize that God responded in this manner to establish yet another example for us-that Job still loved Him even though the very nature of His response could have been the straw that broke the camel’s back. How like a child…that rare humility.

Unless you become like little children, you cannot enter the kingdom of God. (Matthew 18:3)

“May God, instill in us the desire to become more childlike…always loving, always forgiving. In Jesus’ name-Amen”

Encouragement 4 The Day-"Would you still love Me?"

I’ve always had a problem with persevering in prayer before God because If felt, that if I asked Him once for something- why should I have to ask Him again? That repeated beseeching in my mind amounted to begging and I don’t particularly care to beg (it’s a pride thing). Besides, if God loved us more than a parent loves a child, why He would require that we supplicate and when Job cried out to Him, and did not curse or desert Him, why did He allow Job to continue suffering?

(I feel the need to place a disclaimer here: these are my thoughts. They are not doctrine, I am not a minister and even if I was-I would encourage you to seek answers from God for yourself.)

So does God intend for us to beg before He answers our prayers? I realized that maybe I was looking at it from a distorted point of view due to my pride. Then the thought occurred to me:

“Could it be that God doesn’t necessarily want us to beg but is testing us to see, if when He does not answer right away or says “No”, would we still love Him?”

It was then I began to realize how vulnerable God is when it comes to our love. Yes, indeed I said it…that an all powerful God is vulnerable. He will not force us to love Him so He is at our mercy when it comes to receiving love from us. Is it then hard to imagine that He would want to test the depth of that love? But you say: “Shouldn’t He already know how deeply we love Him-after all in addition to being all powerful He is all knowing.” True, but have you ever been in a relationship where you believed that the other person “had your back”, your declared that they “had your back” but what happened when it was proven that they were there for you no matter what. There is an even stronger bond that developed …the relationship grew out of adversity.

Indeed, it’s easy to love someone when they provide us with exactly what we want, when we want it. The true test of love comes when conditions aren’t favorable and aren’t conducive to love. God doesn’t want ordinary love…He aches for the type of love that cries out as Job did: Though He slays me, yet will I trust Him!